A “Small Wedding” may mean something different for each bride. Some couples feel a “small wedding” refers to the number of guests (less than 200 may seem small for some and less than 50 is small for others.) For others “small” may refer to the bridal party, where only a few attendants (or none) are included. Either way, a “small wedding” also means that you may be able to do some special things that other brides & grooms cannot do. Since what constitutes a "small" wedding varies, and the formality may vary as well, some of the tips below may be more or less appropriate for your “small wedding”. Either way, it will offer you a “cozy and intimate” exchange of vows. Invite who you want to be there.
Strong reactions to your “small wedding” will be mixed. Some of the reactions will be supportive as some of your friends and family may have had a positive experience with a small wedding or were part of a large wedding planning and are envious of your wisdom.
Negative reactions may range from those being left out of the “small wedding,” to those that think you’re naïve in believing you can actually have a small wedding, to family members who want to show their style to all their friends and colleagues.
It’s your wedding… do it your way! It’s only natural that people close to you may feel some ownership in your wedding, and bring their own expectations to bear. However, that doesn't mean that you can't have a small wedding!
Well meaning friends may even say, “You won't get all those great gifts!" That may be true… however, with the money you save on a small wedding, you can buy yourself what you really need/want!
Your small wedding setting can be at your church, synagogue, restaurants, gardens, bed & breakfast, historic inn, museums, historic home, your own home, on a boat, or in a courthouse. Some of these places may not advertise for weddings, but that's because they too don’t think about the “small wedding.” Consider yourself lucky--you have some unique options that the average bride doesn't have!! Just ask.
A small intimate wedding may make it easy for you to consider having the wedding, the reception, or both in your own or a relative's home. If you’re choosing the locale for cost, remember that you may need to rent chairs, tables, catering supplies, table cloths, portable toilet, tents and heaters, and other items for your wedding. This may add up more quickly than anticipated.
A destination or mini-vacation wedding for you and your guests to the Copper Country may be feasible for your small wedding party. You can honeymoon at the same spot after your guests depart, or move on to yet another place. Hancock Beach cityofhancock.com
Calumet Golf Course calumetgolfclub.com/
Porvoo Park cityofhancock.com
A small wedding also offers you the ability to customize your service. In such a setting, you can
*Allow guests to mix and mingle before the service over wine and hors d’oeuvres and begin the wedding with a toast
*Give each member of your families a flower. As you walk down the aisle, have them each hand you their flower that you can hold as your bouquet. The groom can take a ribbon to match your dress and help you wrap it together as a symbol of your union.
*Have members of your family do the readings and sing
*Ask older family members if they had any ethnic or family traditions that they used at their wedding, and incorporate those in yours.
*Be your own "ushers" at the end of the service by greeting each guest as they leave their pew.
*Encourage each guest to use an entire page of your guestbook to share advice to the new couple!
*Use the mat around a photo of the wedding couple for guests to sign.
Your flowers can be as simple or extravagant as you want. From a full bouquet (round, cascading, or loose style,) to a single stem, the size and amount of flowers can match even the larger weddings. You can offer corsages, boutonnieres or bouquets for those attending. You can also have reception flowers or plants as gifts for those attending. Six or eight singles sticks of bamboo gathered in the center of the tables can given as a thank you to guests for sharing your special day.
Wedding photography can be from a professional or a family member or friend. Don’t forgo this option just because it’s a “small wedding”. A photo to look back on when you’ve been married 50 years will be appreciated.
Teresa Stachowiak
Madions Nicole Photography
A special program with notes of who is invited, why they were invited, (Thank you Aunt Ellen for letting me borrow your handkerchief; Thank you Cousin Mary and Uncle Joe for using your talents and taking our wedding photos, etc.) You can even include photos of the couple at special stages in their relationship in the program.
A wedding reception can become a “wedding supper” at a restaurant. You can make it as simple or as lavish as you prefer. (Let the restaurant know how many will be attending so they can have enough staff to handle you.)
*Consider renting a trolley for transportation.
*Have your photographer take photos of all your guests and you can send them a copy with their thank you!*If the reception is in a historic home or museum, have a tour guide on hand to answer questions.
*A local string quartet, harpist, or other unique musical performer can offer the background music you desire. Your own computer with speakers can also offer your favorite tunes.
*Take advantage of the smaller size group to mingle. Large weddings do not always offer this opportunity.
Library Restaurant and Brew Pub
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Library-Restaurant-Brew-Pub/120802791337831
Nutini’s Supper Club
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Nutinis-Supper-Club/344152372007?ref=ts&sk=wall
Copper Island Beach Club
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Copper-Island-Beach-Club-Inc/111636968875364
Throwing a bouquet is acceptable or the bride can hand all of the single women a single flower from her bouquet. Throwing a garter is also acceptable or you can share a toast with all the single men.
A wedding cake can be tiered or a sheet cake. Cupcakes, a pie, or cheesecake is also acceptable. The couple should decide what they like and go with it! If you have extra cake, you can always make arrangements with a nursing home or shelter to drop it off to share your love with others.
Roy’s Pasties and Bakery (Elaine) www.sheldonsbakery.com
Make sure the wedding is what you want and can afford. It is your day – do it your way!
